attractive black couple displaying sexual tension

Sexual Tension: Is It Real? Here’s What You Should Know

Sexual tension. What is it? How does it feel? How do you deal with it? All of these questions and more may be cycling through your head, especially if you think there is sexual tension between you and someone else.

sexy couple looking at each other with sexual tension

What does Sexual Tension Feel Like?

You may notice butterflies in your stomach when that certain someone is around. Or, you may feel yourself wanting to be closer to them or to touch them.

All of these feelings are fantastic and at the same time fantastically awful. This is what sexual tension feels like.

But, of course, these aren’t the only ways that sexual tension can manifest itself. Other signs can include:

  • your heart beating just a little bit faster when that person is around.
  • getting a little clammy and sweaty at the mere sight of them.
  • being reduced to a puddle when they even so much as speak to you.
  • feeling giddy or giggly when they are around.
  • not being able to get rid of your goofy grin when they pay attention to you.

Definite Signs You’re “Feeling” Someone

Then, there’s the way you think about that person. Have you had fantasies or dreams about the person sexually? Do you think about them and their body when they’re not around? How about imaging having possible future interactions with them? Or you bringing them up when talking to other people?

If you answer “yes” to any of those questions, then you’re definitely feeling some intense sexual tension when it comes to that person. And, this leads into the idea of having sexual chemistry with someone.

interracial couple displaying sexual tension and sexual chemistry

What About Sexual Chemistry?

But what about when you interact with each other? What are the signs of mutual sexual tension? Or the signs that you both feel it? And what are the signs you have true sexual chemistry?

Well, for one thing, you make frequent eye contact with one another. If you feel your eyes drawn to that person and you notice that they are looking at you, and you lock eyes, there’s chemistry there. You two are connecting on an intimate level by gazing into each other’s eyes, even if for a brief second.

However, there is eye contact and then there is the desire or the impulse to just stare. If you find yourself staring in the direction of a person, even without realizing you’re doing it until you have been staring for a while, you have sexual chemistry with that person. And if they are doing the same, yeah, it’s definitely mutual feeling.

And of course, you may also be drawn to check out different parts of their body. If you are gazing longingly at their pecs, abs, butt, or mouth, for example, you are feeling that sexual heat. And if you notice a coy gaze here and there from the other person, say a lingering glace at your chest, then you are in mutual sexual chemistry territory to be sure.

Sexual Chemistry and Body Language

Chemistry also comes in the form of body language. Do you:

  • lean into each other when you speak?
  • feel yourselves getting closer?
  • touch each other’s shoulders or arms when you address one another?

All of these are signs of very real and palpable sexual chemistry.

There is also the talking itself. Now, this is where things sometimes get confusing.You would think if you have chemistry with someone that the talking would be easy.

But sometimes the sexual chemistry is so thick that it fogs the brain and makes the conversation itself a bit awkward and strange. And everything often feels like it has a sexual or flirty innuendo to it.

attractive couple relieving sexual tension on couch

How Do You Relieve Sexual Tension?

When it comes to sexual tension that you can cut with a knife, you have to wonder what you can do about it. Well, there are two options depending on your situation. Act or don’t act.

If you want to see where this goes and are free to do so, pursue it. Flirt back with the person more. Show signs that you are interested.

Or you can just come out and tell them you are interested. Be honest and open about the signals you have been receiving and how you feel in return. This can be a bit difficult to do, but worth the risk in most cases. Either way, whether they are interested or not, you will have relieved the sexual tension you are feeling.

In cases where you simply cannot act on the sexual tension you are feeling, getting some distance is a great way to start. If you can avoid the person or try to emotionally distance yourself from them, do it. And should those feelings still linger even with distance, you may want to reevaluate your current situation and decide whether or not you want to make some changes.

Now Back to You

As you can see, sexual tension is a real thing. Knowing more about sexual tension and sexual chemistry will help you decide whether you are “feeling” someone and what to do about it.

Although, these feeling can be exciting. Just remember that consent from the other party is key before taking things to the next level.

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